Ass Sayings
Top 20 Sayings about Asses


Pig’s ass is pork no matter how you cut it.

Your ass is jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth.

Yoga pants with no ass is like a wallet with no cash.

Yoga pants are push-up bras for asses.

I must have an amazing butt, every time I walk away from someone, I hear them whisper, 'What an ass!'

If you're talking behind my back, you're in a good position to kiss my ass!

Men look at a woman's behind and go "Wow! What an ass!" Woman look at a man's face and think the same.

This Christmas I'm putting mistletoe in my back pocket so all the people who annoy me can kiss my ass!

Only toilet paper deals with more assholes than I do on a regular basis.

Well, another day has passed and I haven't used algebra once.

My friends are the best friends - loyal, willing and able.
Now let's get to drinking! All glasses off the table!

It's a beautiful day. Now watch some asshole fuck it up.

I'm not a proctologist. But I know an asshole when I see one.

Sometimes I drink a glass of water ... Just to surprise my liver!

You're like school in the summertime - no classes!

No, I'm not a smartass. I'm a skilled, trained, professional in pointing out the obvious and I speak fluent sarcasm!

I feel something in my heart. It's like a little flame. Every time I see you, this flame lights up. This flame is special for you, because I love you!

I feel like I should clean the house, so I am going to lay down and nap until that feeling passes.

The fluffy cloud may kiss the sky,
the rose may kiss the butterfly,
the morning due may kiss the grass,
but you my friend may kiss my lips!

Never wait until tomorrow to hug someone you could hug today, because when you give one, you get one right back your way.

The moment I first saw you, you warmed my heart, the second time you made little flames and now you make my heart burn like hell!

If you think the grass is greener on the other side, it's because it's fertilized with bullshit.

May the grass grow long on the road to hell for want of use.

Single women can't fart. They don't have an asshole until they're married.

A finger a day keeps the assholes away!

Boys go, boys come -
always tell me I'm the one.
Same asshole, different face.
Different promises - same old base.

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