Man Sayings
Top 20 Sayings about Men



I have a penis. Blame me for everything!

Behind every angry woman stands a man who has absolutely no idea what he did wrong.

Boobs are to men what laser pointers are to cats.

The most honest compliment of a man is a boner.

Boobs! The proof that men can focus on two things at once.

Men wear the pants, but women control the zipper.

Men are idiots and I married their king.

During labor, the pain is so great that a woman can almost imagine what a man feels like when he has a cold.

In a relationship one person is always right and the other person is male.

Men look at a woman's behind and go "Wow! What an ass!" Woman look at a man's face and think the same.

Single women can't fart. They don't have an asshole until they're married.

Here's to our wives and girlfriends - may they never meet!

Boys go, boys come -
always tell me I'm the one.
Same asshole, different face.
Different promises - same old base.

There are many good reasons for drinking.
One has just entered my head.
If a man doesn't drink when he's living.
How the hell can he drink when he's dead?

Catch the moments as they fly
and use them as ye ought man -
believe me happiness is shy
and comes not aye when sought man.

People say you only fall in love once, but when I hear your voice I fall in love all over again.

I saw angels in the sky.
I saw snow fall in july.
I saw things you only imagine to see or do,
but I still haven’t seen anything sweeter than you!

I want to be the little cup, from which you drink your tea.
And everytime you take a drink, you would be kissing me!

You can't wrap love in a box, but you can wrap a person in a hug.

Love is like a flower. If you don't take care, it will die!

Beauty is power; a smile is its sword.

If a kiss is a snowflake I would send you a whole snowstorm!

At night I cannot sleep and during the day I dream of you!

If someone truely loves you they’ll see your beauty inside of you.

Sometimes I get road rage walking behind people at the grocery store.

What ever you say, what ever you do, I will always love you.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet and so are you.

Where there is love there is life.

I feel something in my heart. It's like a little flame. Every time I see you, this flame lights up. This flame is special for you, because I love you!

I see humans but where is the humanity?

Growing old is mandatory. But growing up is optional.

Love me, or let it be, but don't play with me!

I have known many - liked not a few - loved only one - so this toast is for you.

Good night my love! We will meet each other in our dreams to spend a few moments with love and happines together. I love you!

Being a human is too complicated. Time to be a unicorn.

Inside me is a thin woman trying to get out. I usually shut the bitch up with chocolate.

Math is a drama queen. It can't seriously have that many problems.

I wonder if clouds ever look down on us and say: "Hey look, that one is shaped like an idiot."

I am not an early bird or a night owl. I am some form of a permanently exhausted pigeon.

The moment I first saw you, you warmed my heart, the second time you made little flames and now you make my heart burn like hell!

When butterflies fall in love, do they have humans inside their stomach?

A butterfly needs its wings: An icebear needs cold weather. And I - I need you!

May God grant you many years to live, for sure he must be knowing, the earth has angels all too few and heaven is overflowing.

I hated the rain until I danced with you, then like the rain, I fell for you.

Fuck is easy, fuck is funny,
many people fuck for money.
If you think that fuck is funny,
fuck yourself and safe your money!

Like an Irishman's obligation, all on one side and always yours.

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