Fake hair. Fake nails. Fake smile. Girl, are you sure, you weren't made in China?
Do you want a perfect girl? Go and buy a Barbie!
The only difference between a good girl and a bad girl is, that good girls are very selective who they're bad with.
Skinny girls look good in clothes. Fit girls look good naked.
May you have nicer legs than yours under the table, before the new spuds are up.
Here's to our wives and girlfriends - may they never meet!
Dear boys, I can make your girlfriend scream louder then you ever will. Sincerely, Spider
Here's to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold pint - and another one!