You can't wrap love in a box, but you can wrap a person in a hug.
I have tits. Give me free stuff!
If you have ever masturbated to my pictures, you owe me a fucking Valentine’s Day gift.
If each day is a gift, I would like to know where to return Monday.
Dear Santa, this year please give me a big fat bank account and a slim body. Please don't mix those two up like you did last year. Thanks.
Sayings